What shit situation are you grateful for today?

Well I have lots to say on the subject of 'gratitude', and I really wanted to share it with you in the hope that you can relate it to your own life whether you have a formal gratitude practice or not.

So if you've been following me for a little while, you will have heard me talk about gratitude before. It's something that I have practised for many years and found it massively helpful in not only shifting my mood, but also my perspective in a far bigger way. Firstly, let's untangle the 'gratitude practice' I'm talking about... Most people are innately grateful and appreciate the good things and the people they have in their lives and most people would thank those around them too. The reason I call it a 'practice' is because this is when we are intentional about seeking out and somehow recording what we are grateful for. A practice is something we do regularly rather than a one-off thing now and again. A gratitude practice is something that we choose to do even when we don't feel we have lots to be grateful for (and I would say - especially at those times).

The thing is, our brains are wired to look for the 'bad stuff', it's part of our protection system and designed to keep us safe. So we have no problem in noticing stuff that's gone wrong and replaying it again and again in our heads, leading us in a downward spiral and often beating ourselves up about it at the same time. So we have to train our brains to look for the good stuff as that muscle is not quite as strong, so it needs a workout.

So why am I asking you about your shitty situations? Well, I believe (and from my own experience), that if we can train our brains to accept, explore and be grateful for ALL our experiences then we will never run out of things to be grateful for. If we can work with whatever we are experiencing in our lives then things no longer become 'bad' or 'good', they are experiences and that gives us more power and freedom over our own happiness.

So think of something that hasn't gone so well for you today... Maybe nothing too significant for now, but something that didn't go to plan, maybe someone that annoyed you.

Ask yourself....

'What part of this could I be grateful for?'

'Who am I grateful for in this situation?'

'What opportunities did it bring me?'

'What did I learn about myself?'

A note… This is not about turning the situation into a positive. If you are hurt, allow yourself to feel it. We are not invalidating if someone behaved badly. We are FULLY experiencing the situation from all perspectives. We can feel sad, angry, disappointed AND feel gratitude at the same time. We can make room for all of it. We are pretty clever at being able to hold lots of conflicting stuff at the same time.

And if this feels like a struggle, don't worry, remember it's a practice. Start with writing a list of all the 'good' stuff you're grateful for too. You'll still be exercising the muscle.

Let me know your thoughts on this. How did it feel? There's no right or wrong answers, just experiences…

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash