Play BEFORE Work
So this is for you if….
You find it hard to stop and just do nothing sometimes
Your time is filled with ‘productive’ tasks but very little room for play or doing something just for the fun of it
You feel like if you’re not being busy then you’re lazy
You get to the end of the day and beat yourself up about all the things you didn’t get done
This is what I’ve been working on lately. The above list is a bit of a trap I fall into from time to time, and each time I do, I think ‘Argggh I’m doing it again!’. After 6 years of self-employment I’ve got to know myself pretty well and yet I still get caught out by these sneaky little habits that creep up on me and zap my energy and rob me of my joy.
It’s been a busy few weeks with lots of great stuff happening and so the sensible thing would be to slow down and give myself a break, but for some reason I find it hard to give myself the permission to actually take my own advice.
The messages that run through all my work and projects are ‘Be your own best friend’ and ‘Be brave, choose happiness’. Funny isn’t it how the things we want for others are just the things we are yearning for ourselves.
So I have been taking my own advice and walking the talk. Last week I spent some time with a mentor sorting out my mental crap and my homework was to put some boundaries in place around my work to make room for more fun, play and creativity in my days. And here is what I’m learning and working on…
My worth is not defined by how ‘busy’ I am
Ah the glorification of ‘busy’. People often ask me ‘How’s the business going? Busy?’ Most of the time I reply ‘Good thanks, lots of exciting stuff happening’, which on the whole is true, but I’m not really ‘busy’, and to be honest I don’t want to be. I’ve created a working life that’s not busy, why would I set up something that has me run ragged the same as I was when I was employed! But when I answer them, there’s a part of me that feels ashamed to say ‘No I’m not busy at all’, like somehow I will appear lazy if I’m not working every hour god sends, that in some way the success of my work is measured by how busy I am, and that working really hard is linked to how worthy I am as a person.
There’s a lovely Zen proverb that says…
‘You should sit in meditation for 20 minutes daily – unless you’re too busy, then you should sit for an hour’.
This makes me giggle because it’s a paradox, and what I’m learning is that when I get into that mindset of ‘I must do more’ that’s my cue to just stop and do nothing. This takes a lot of courage, when our society pushes us to believe that by doing more and working harder we will achieve more and be a better person. But my homework right now is to make time for ‘nothing’ in my day. The only way I can prove to myself that less is more, is by slowing down, taking time out and watch what happens. And it really is a challenge. My brain is not completely sold on this yet, so I have to keep giving it the evidence that my business won’t collapse if I take a nap, people won’t unsubscribe from me letters if I miss a week, and that I can be happy and successful working when and how I choose.
My brain needs diversity and creativity
I think this goes for all of us. Our brains like novelty as much as they like routine. I believe that we are all creative deep down, and I don’t necessarily mean in the traditional ‘arty’ sense. We have to be creative, problem solve, plan, arrange and make stuff happen every day. But there’s a difference between using our creativity with a purpose or agenda – like planning, problems solving, and using our creativity without any agenda, just for the sheer fun of it. Speaking with my mentor I realised that this is something that’s been missing for me, and it reminded me that I am a really creative person and need to make time for it for me to be at my best. I play the harp, but I only really play when I’ve got a wedding coming up or something to practice for and so I rarely sit down and just play for pleasure. When I play I notice that I can’t think about anything else, it’s just impossible and so it really gives my thinking mind a rest. It’s like changing gear and something I’ve been doing in between work tasks. Again this isn’t easy to do, but I am so much more focused on a task, when I’ve given my mind that chance to be creative without an agenda – just for the pure fun of it.
Giving myself permission to play BEFORE work
Play before work is something I’ve created through my Soulful Sunrise events. Putting play at the top of our agenda for most of us is the opposite of how we live. Playtime is usually used as a reward for hard work, and so we keep it until the end of the day, the weekend or the holidays, when we’ve earned it. But just like having time to be creative, making time for fun, play and general silliness is not something just for kids, we actually need it for our sanity. It can be so easy for me to work all hours of the day, because my office is in my house, but I know that there are only a few hours in the day where I am really focused on ‘office’ work and that much of my work doesn’t require me to be sitting at my desk. So I have been creating a better working pattern for myself, where playing is part of my day instead of an add on at the end. I love music and looking for new artists, so in the morning if I don’t have to be somewhere I spend a bit of time on itunes or listening to a podcast, it lifts my mood and gets me in a good head space for the day. Or maybe I go for a run and play with the dog for a bit longer in the park, instead of rushing back. These fun moments open up my mind and lighten me up, so when I do have to deal with something important I am more resourceful.
I’ve thought about how important this stuff is for a long time, and as I said, it’s something I have to work on in my own life. That’s why the experiences I create for people in my work are about helping you to have more fun, happiness and joy in your life. This is not something that’s just nice to have, it’s essential for our mental health.
So if this has rang any bells for you, then have a think about how you can be less ‘busy’, how you can make room for more creativity and play in your day, and let me know some of your ideas!!!