Are you grieving?

This one is for you if you are grieving….

AND

If you’re thinking ‘I’m not grieving’ carry on reading because you may not know that you are.

You may or may not know that I’m no stranger to grief and loss. The most significant ones being losing my brother to suicide and my sister to alcoholism in the same week, 9 years ago. Clearly that completely altered my sense of self and the perception of the world. Like a line in the sand that I can never step back over. Every time I write this, I still catch myself wondering if this really happened to me, like as if it’s become a story I tell about somebody else.

You may have had something similar happen to you - losing someone you love.

However much we live our lives pretending that we’re all going to be here forever, we know that everything and everyone we love we will loose.

And I don’t say this to bring misery to your day, but actually to bring some aliveness, some perspective. And whilst you may understand this in your logical mind, I’m not sure that we actually live and embody this truth - like really live as if everything and everyone we love we will loose.

And I believe that until we are connected to our grief that it’ not possible to live with this much aliveness.

Grief is not only about those significant losses in our life.

It’s feeling the pain of all the loses we’ve experienced through our lives.

The loss of our childhood innocence.

The loss of what we hoped would be.

The loss of what we expected or needed but didn’t get.

The loss of time, ageing.

The loss of good times.

The loss of the person we used to be.

The loss of health, energy, vitality.

The loss of our environment.

The loss of connection, loneliness.

As I write this, I well up. I think of all the people in my life who are grieving, right now, including me. Every single one of us.

And so as you read this, do you recognise your own grief? Are you able to allow yourself to feel that sadness?

Don’t be afraid of it. It is human. And we are all feeling it right now.

So…….

I have an idea that’s been brewing for a while.

I am working out loud here. This is me sharing the first public phase of this idea.

‘Grief in nature’

This summer I am going to be bringing together a group of brave souls who are longing to be able to explore their grief in a way that feels human, relaxed and non-clinical.

This will be a small group experience, outdoors, in nature, in Cardiff.

I really feel there is lack of spaces where we can explore the human nature of grief. Over the years I have had therapy, coaching, attended peer support groups, which have all been helpful in their own way. But I still feel that as a society we see grief as a problem to be fixed. Something to ‘therapize’, like as if we are broken. Something to be done behind closed doors.

The way we suppress our grief in our society is traumatic. We are not meant to to do this alone. We are denying our human experience. Being in nature takes us back to times when we were connected as humans. Where someones loss wasn’t only their loss, but was shared by the tribe, in a circle, under the trees.

This will not be a therapy group or even a bereavement group. I am creating a space where people can come and feel supported by me, each other and nature. It will be open to all forms of grief and loss. I will bring all my skills and experience of creating warm, friendly group spaces, and share practices and rituals that support you to be yourself, but most importantly I will be there with my own experience of grief, as a companion.

If this sounds like something you would be interested in, reply to this email with a ‘YES’, and expect more info in the next few weeks.

Ooh it feels good to get this out of my head and into words to share with you.